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DAVID CARR FROM
HOW TO BE GOOD SPEAKS

On the theatre:

I hate the theatre. I hate the playwrights, I hate the plays, I hate the actors, I hate the critics, I hate the audience, I hate the programmes, I hate the little tubs of ice-cream they sell in the intervals. I once tried to write a column explaining why I hate safety curtains, but I couldn't quite find the requisite 800 words.

David Carr: The Angriest Man in Holloway

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DAVID CARR FROM
HOW TO BE GOOD SPEAKS

People and buses:

Why do they never have their money ready? Why don't they use the seats set aside for them at the front of the bus? Why do they insist on standing up ten minutes before their stop, thus obliging them to fall over frequently in an alarming and undignified fashion?

David Carr: The Angriest Man in Holloway

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DAVID CARR FROM
HOW TO BE GOOD SPEAKS

1/4 - People in world history who are overrated wankers:

Oasis, the Stones, Paul McCartney, John Lennon, Robbie Williams, Kingsley Amis, Martin Amis, Evelyn Waugh, Auberon Waugh, Salman Rushdie, Jeffrey Archer, Tony Blair, Gordon Brown, William Shakespeare (the comedies and some of the history plays only), Charles Dickens, E. M. Forster, Daniel Day-Lewis, the Monty Python team, Gore Vidal, John Updike, Thomas Harris, Gabriel Garcia Marquez, Milan Kundera, Damien Hirst

David Carr: The Angriest Man in Holloway

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DAVID CARR FROM
HOW TO BE GOOD SPEAKS

2/4 - People in world history who are overrated wankers:

Tracey Emin, Melvyn Bragg, Dennis Bergkamp, David Beckham, Ryan Giggs, Sam Mendes, Anthony Burgess, Virginia Woolf, Michael Nyman, Philip Glass, Stephen Speilberg, Leonardo diCaprio, Ted Hughes, Mark Hughes, Sylvia Plath, Stevie Smith, Maggie Smith, the Smiths

David Carr: The Angriest Man in Holloway

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DAVID CARR FROM
HOW TO BE GOOD SPEAKS

3/4 - People in world history who are overrated wankers:

Pete Sampras and all contemporary male tennis players, Monica Seles and all female tennis players throughout history, Pele, Maradona, Linford Christie, Maurice Greene, T.S. Eliot and Ezra Pound, Gilbert and Sullivan, Gilbert and George, Ben and Jerry, Powell and Pressburger, Marks and Spencer, the Coen brothers, Stevie Wonder, Nicole Farhi and anyone who designs fucking suits for a living, Naomi Campbell, Kate Moss, Johnny Depp, Stephen Sondheim

David Carr: The Angriest Man in Holloway

" randhtml[5] = "

DAVID CARR FROM
HOW TO BE GOOD SPEAKS

4/4 - People in world history who are overrated wankers:

Bart Simpson (but not Homer Simpson), Homer, Virgil, Coleridge, Keats and all the Romantic poets, Jane Austen, all the Brontës, all the Kennedys, the people who made the film of Trainspotting, the people who made the film of Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, Madonna, the Pope, anyone I was at school or college with who is now making a name for themselves in the fields of journalism, broadcasting or the arts, and many, many others, so many others, too many to list here

David Carr: The Angriest Man in Holloway

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