Michael Symmons Roberts’s fourth book of poetry, Corpus, was the winner of the 2004 Whitbread Poetry Award, and was shortlisted for the T. S. Eliot Prize, the Forward Prize, and the Griffin International Prize. His sixth collection, Drysalter, was the winner of both the Forward Prize and the Costa Poetry Prize in 2013. He collaborated with Paul Farley on Edgelands (Cape/Vintage) and will do so again in The Deaths of the Poets (Cape, 2017). He has also worked many times with the composer James MacMillan. He has published two novels, and is Professor of Poetry at Manchester Metropolitan University.

Michael Symmons Roberts

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Lissa Evans

'Bloody funny, bloody moving - bloody buy it!' - Meera Syal 
 
Some people live life in the fast lane. Others have stalled and are waiting for assistance on the side of the road, sustained only by the piece of chewing gum they've just found in the glove compartment. 
 
Spencer's ex-lover has died, leaving him a lizard and a list of things to do before the end of the year. 
 
Spencer's friend Fran shares a house and a mortgage with her brother and his girlfriend, a woman with delicate wrists and a bloated cat. 
 
Fran's neighbour Iris is slave to the three men in her life: an aging father who likes the phone and two teenage sons who cannot fathom the washing machine. 
 
Maybe it's not about living life in the fast lane. It's about learning to live at all. 
 
Spencer's List is a wonderfully funny tale of life lived on the edge - of reason, of failure and of (just possibly) a brighter future. 
 
Featuring an extract of the next book by Lissa Evans, V FOR VICTORY

Spencer's List

From the bestselling author of Old Baggage

Mitchell Symons

When Mitchell Symons wrote his extraordinary bestsellers This Book, That Book and The Other Book - all neatly combined in one sensational volume, The Ultimate Loo Book - he was judged by many to be the King of Trivia. Now, inThe Bumper Book for the Loo, this supremo of weird and wonderful, astonishing and inexplicable facts, figures, stats and stories returns with a super selection of trivialistic treats - each one more remarkable and, yes, even more trivial than anything he's compiled before. 
 
For example, did you know that... 
 
·The first alarm clock could only ring at 4 a.m... 
·There was once an internet rumour that Belgium doesn't exist... 
·In 1830, King Louis XIX ruled France for just 15 minutes... 
·All mammals have jaws but only humans have chins... 
·Peru has more pyramids than Egypt... 
 
Packed to the rafters with all manner of useful and useless information, lists of the biggest, the smallest, the best and the worst, The Bumper Book for the Loo is a hilarious compendium of endless delights - and a hugely entertaining, unputdownable feat of nonsense!

The Bumper Book For The Loo

Facts and figures, stats and stories – an unputdownable treat of trivia

James Hogg

Robert Sellers

Spontaneous, hilarious, irrepressible and, of course, trailblazing - Kenny Everett was revolutionary in television and radio comedy. Chris Evans, Chris Moyles, Rob Brydon and Steve Wright have all cited Kenny as a huge influence on their work - even the great Spike Milligan called him a genius. It was Kenny who developed the radio show format with which we are so familiar today: a mix of music, jingles, funny voices and sound effects. When he seamlessly made the move to television in the seventies, he created unforgettable characters such as Sid Snot, Cupid Stunt and Marcel Wave. 
 
Rarely seen without a smile on his face in public, in reality, Kenny was a deeply insecure man who suffered severe bouts of depression. He also struggled with his sexuality, only coming out to the public in 1985. Diagnosed with HIV in 1987, Kenny died in 1995. 
 
This in-depth and affectionate biography has been fully authorised by Kenny's family and contains original interviews with Kenny's sister, Kate and with his former wife, Lee, as well as entertainment figures such as Barry Cryer, Cliff Richard, Chris Tarrant and Paul Gambaccini. Packed with fabulous stories about the highs and lows of Kenny's life, his great friendships with The Beatles and Freddie Mercury, this is a book that any fan of comedy and entertainment must read.

Hello, Darlings!

The Authorized Biography of Kenny Everett

'Evans is very funny . . . the Tom Sharpe for the next generation' Sunday Express 
 
Some are born odd, some achieve oddness and some are just in the wrong place at the wrong time… 
 
Netta Lee had always felt like the odd one out growing up. But when, as an adult, she returns to the Midlands to help her family move house, it becomes apparent that perhaps she isn’t the unusual one after all. A brother with a penchant for rubbish collection, a mother who seems to think she’s running the Bolshoi Ballet rather than the local junior dance school and a hoard of questionably competent friends challenge Netta’s ordered world. 
 
Perhaps the life – and the people – she tried so hard to leave behind are not as distant as she thought.

Odd One Out

'This is a comic novel, but far warmer in tone and broader in scope than that label would suggest....Gloriously observed... Delicious.' - Times (London) 
 
In a man's world, it's up to Catrin Cole to lift the spirits of a nation... 
 
 It's 1940. In a small advertising agency in Soho, Catrin writes snappy lines for Vida Elastic and So-Bee-Fee gravy browning. But the country is in peril, all skills are transferable and there's a place in the war effort for those who have a knack with words. 
 
 Catrin is conscripted into the world of propaganda films. After a short spell promoting the joy of swedes for the Ministry of Food, she finds herself writing dialogue alongside scriptwriter Tom Buckley, for a heart-warming but not-quite-true story of rescue and romance on the beaches of Dunkirk. 
 
And as bombs start to fall on London, she discovers that there's just as much drama, comedy and love behind the scenes as there is in front of the camera . . .

Their Finest

A heart-warming, touching novel from the Sunday Times bestselling author

Pip Granger

Perfect for fans of Donna Douglas and Nancy Revell, a heart-warming saga set in post war London from Sunday Times bestselling author Pip Granger. 
 
"She brings the East End to life..." - Barbara Windsor 
"Read it straight through..." - ***** Reader review. 
"Love her writing." - ***** Reader review. 
 
*************************** 
 
1945: The end of the war spreads joy through London, but for Zelda Fluck the news isn't all good. The end to hostilities will bring her violent husband Charlie home. It also sets off a chain of events that brings more strife and destruction to the people of Paradise Gardens in Hackney than did the Blitz. 
 
 That's not all. Zelda's nephew, Tony, is hanging around Brian Hole, a one-boy crime wave and only child of Ma Hole, leader of the local spivs. 
 
 But Tony can sing - he has, in fact, the voice of an angel - and Zelda's friend, Zinnia knows a voice coach in Soho whose lessons may be able to straighten Tony out. 
 
The people Zelda meets there change her life. Will she find a way out of Hackney and her failed marriage? 
 
Trouble in Paradise is a prequel to Pip Granger's Rosie novels...

Trouble In Paradise

A fantastically funny and feel-good tale from the East End…

John O'Farrell

A doctor in America has just invented a 'sperm sorting machine'. At least that's what he claimed when his receptionist burst into the office to find him doing something peculiar with the Hoover attachment. Apparently the system used for separating the male and female sperm is remarkably simple. A sample is placed in the petri dish with a microscopic pile of household items on a tiny staircase. All the sperm that go straight past without picking anything up are obviously boys. 
 
John O'Farrell's first collection of columns GLOBAL VILLAGE IDIOT was a huge success prompting fulsome praise from such major public figures as the Queen Mother, Roy Jenkins and Cardinal Hume. Sadly, since their deaths, their glowing endorsements cannot be officially verified. So here instead is another collection of funny, satirical essays on a hundred and one 21st century subjects. Read how the government plans to introduce 'Santa loans' that will leave school children £10,000 in debt for all the presents that used to be free from Father Christmas. Learn how the EU is being expanded to include Narnia. And did you know that American war planes now have a little sticker on the back saying 'How's my bombing?' with an 0800 number to call if they blow up any Muslim country in a discourteous of aggressive manner . . .

I Blame The Scapegoats

Colm O'Regan

Colm O’Regan’s massive bestseller Isn’t It Well For Ye? The Book of Irish Mammies brought the wonderful world of the Irish Mammy to homes across Ireland, where it took pride of place alongside the good scissors and the bit of string that might come in handy someday. And now, before you can say “Is it that time already?”, Irish Mammy is back with more words of wisdom. 
That’s More Of It Now: The Second Book of Irish Mammies takes us even deeper into this parallel universe, with advice on everything from how to tell Mammy she is about to become a Granny to how to discipline a child (aged 0–45), touching on Irish Mammies’ role in the worlds of sport, the workplace, technology, religion and culture. Enjoy popular fairy-tales retold with an Irish Mammy at the centre of them; marvel at exclusive, not-yet-released scenes from the epic Game of Scones; and find some essential apps for the Modern Mammy’s tablet. 
Probably the most important sequel since The Godfather Part II, or at least Fifty Shades Darker, That’s More Of It Now will find a place in everybody’s heart (and stocking). Just don’t leave it on a damp step.

That's More Of It Now

The Second Book Of Irish Mammies

Gabrielle Grillo

Lucy Sweet

The publisher wishes to make clear that this is not a book of knitting patterns, but a photographic collection of some of the weird and wonderful things that people have created using needles and wool. The publisher works closely with Amazon to ensure that any book search provides accurate information, and apologises if anyone has bought WFT Knits thinking its contents to be other than photographic and just for fun. 
 
An hilarious photographic collection of the weirdest knits you'll ever see! 
 
Forget scarves and bobble hats. Here are the results of some nutty knitting that will really blow your mind... 
 
For the last four years, Gabrielle Grillo has been scouring the web for the most bizarre knitted items she can find. In this hysterically funny book, she has collected the very best of her finds. From a knitted Christmas turkey cosy to woolly vomit, from burgers to a sperm fertilizing an egg - they have to be seen to be believed. 
 
This is a photographic book of fun - full of weird, wonderful and extremely messed-up knitting and crochet creations from around the globe. As you flick through, there'll be a smile on your face and one question on your lips: 'WTF were they thinking?'

WTF Knits

Jilly Cooper

More infectious humour and witty observations from Jilly Cooper, whose latest collection of articles, originally published in The Sunday Times and the Mail on Sunday, includes a light-hearted and irreverent account of a visit to Australia, published for the first time in its entirety. Scenes nearer home, viewed with equal disrespect include th ediverse worlds of a vet's conference, fashionable charity balls, the London to Brighton run and Hen Night in Wandsworth. And, as always, Jilly Cooper is a devastating, hilarious and sometimes moving chronicler of the minutiae of family life, with some fascinating sidelights and side-swipes at the middle-class educational rat race along the way.

Jolly Marsupial

Let me ask you a question. 
Have you ever wondered why pretentiousness, jargon, bullshit and Having Notions Above Our Station are so rife in the world today? Well, there’s now a recognized science that studies all of these forms of self-delusion. Welcome to the world of Bolloxology. 
We might not know it, but the modern world has subjected all of us to some form of Bolloxology. It’s that moment when you’ve paid twenty euro for fish and chips just so it can be served on a piece of slate. It’s when you share yet another Inspirational Quote of the Day against your better judgement. It’s when you realize you haven’t understood a word That Politician has said to you on your doorstep, yet you feel strangely compelled to take a selfie with him. It’s about the passion, the ‘key learnings’, the artisan chutney, the instacelebs. It’s about the Pure Hames we’re making of things. 
In Bolloxology, Colm O’Regan, comedian and author of the bestselling Irish Mammies books, shows that our world is now less a planet and more a hot air balloon. Illustrated by the hilarious Twisted Doodles, Bolloxology is an indispensable guide to the deceptive cod-infested seas of twenty-first-century life.

Bolloxology

Waldo Pancake

Waldo Pancake is loved by millions for his bestselling merchandise, featuring hilariously sarcastic, arrestingly poignant messages, characterised by his own special brand of humour. 
 
One day, Waldo looked around and realised that what the world needed was more of him. Much more. Happily, the result is Live, Believe, Worry a Bit - a beautifully designed little book packed with Waldo's hilarious take on life, the universe and just about everything else, packaged in his unique, trademark style. 
 
So if you are in need of something to put a smile on your face, pick up a copy and dive in. Welcome to Waldo's world!

Live, Believe, Worry a Bit

Emma Freud

Clement Freud, who died suddenly in April 2009, was a man of many parts. His life embraced a variety of careers, including TV chef, gambler, owner of a night club and several racehorses, radio broadcaster, adventurer and - not least - Member of Parliament. Yet, as his son Matthew declared at his funeral, it was Freud's writing that brought us closest to the man. 
 
In addition to several books - notably the children's book Grimble (1968), Freud on Food (1978), The Book of Hangovers (1981) and a volume of autobiography, Freud Ego (2001) - he wrote on a vast range of subjects for newspapers and magazines, including the Observer, Sun, Financial Times, Sporting Life, Daily Mail, Tatler, Guardian, New Yorker and Racing Post. A Feast of Freud presents a generous helping of Clement Freud's best and most humorous writing on a broad sweep of topics, including his consuming passions of food, sport, politics and the absurdity of the human condition, reflecting his extraordinarily varied life through the prism of his distinctive deadpan humour. 
 
From the pen of the man who once joked of being 'out-grandfathered' by the younger Winston Churchill comes this richly stocked volume that every Freud fan, no matter in which of his many lives they encountered him, will treasure.

A Feast of Freud

The wittiest writings of Clement Freud

Flotsam &amp; Jetsam is the ultimate trivia book for fans of the popular BBC Radio 4 programme Desert Island Discs, and a fascinating introduction for all those who have yet to discover its delights. 
 
Taking the reader through seven decades of wonderful entertainment, here is an absorbing range of facts, figures and miscellany – including who chose what, and why. It also reveals much about the castaways' drives and motivations, their influences and, of course, their lives. 
 
Spanning the early years with the original presenter, Roy Plomley, and the present day, the Desert Island Discs programme has brought its own unique surprises to listeners, some very personal, some humorous, such as Eric Morecambe's choice of a deckchair as his luxury and Ernie Wise's of a deckchair ticket machine. 
 
From Beethoven to the Beatles, from chessboards and chocolate to Jane Austen and Zola, Flotsam &amp; Jetsam is the perfect companion guide to the national treasure that is Desert Island Discs.

Desert Island Discs: Flotsam & Jetsam

Fascinating facts, figures and miscellany from one of BBC Radio 4’s best-loved programmes

Ayn Carrillo

It all started when Ayn's boyfriend pronounced her pornophobic - in defence of his own eyebrow-raising reading material. In order to prove that she wasn't a prude (just enlightened), this self-confessed Good Girl found herself jumping headlong into the booming sex industry in order to understand what her boyfriend was so interested in. 
 
She was intrigued to hear that "Porn is not merely acceptable, it's hip" (New York Magazine) and that women were the fastest growing segment in the porn industry. Ayn's quest soon aroused the curiosity of her female friends: and it transpired that the girls - single or married, involved or not - were desperate for information. And so, (in the name of research!) Ayn created her own "porn-to-do list." The items on the list ranged from: 
 
· Reading erotica 
· Meeting a porn star 
· Going to a sex store 
· Testing vibrators 
· Visiting a strip club 
 
Along the way, Ayn ditched the porn-obsessed boyfriend, and learned that one should not try to take change from a stripper's G-string tips, nor is the Hustler store the best place to make a first impression on a hot guy. This is the result of one woman's attempt to pierce the veil that modestly covers something many women are actually fascinated by. Surprising, hilarious, informative, and ultimately non-judgmental, this is one book you won't put down - once you admit you're curious enough to pick it up!

Good Vibrations

Dj Khaled

In The Keys, Snapchat sensation and recording artist DJ Khaled guides you through the pathway to success. Within these pages, he shares the wisdom of his life lessons, such as: 
 
- Stay away from They 
- Don’t ever play yourself 
- Respect the code 
- Win, win win, no matter what 
 
This positive, motivational book will give you the advice you need to go out there and create the life you’ve always wanted. Its upbeat, inspirational message will show you that you can achieve great things if you keep focussed, stay positive and never listen to the doubters.

The Keys

Colm Tobin

It’s exhausting, being Irish. The constant self-flagellation is enough to put anybody off their breakfast. 
Why are we so hard on ourselves? Is it the post-colonial overhang following centuries of oppression at the hands of a litany of foreign invaders? Or is it collective guilt for sending Westlife out into the wider world? 
In Surviving Ireland, acclaimed comedy writer Colm Tobin* takes the reader by the hand for a satirical romp through modern Irish life. As well as providing all the tools you’ll need to navigate this often tricky little island (except a compass or anything even resembling a fact), the book will take you through some of the country’s fraught history, asking some searing questions in the process: how did we get here, where are we going and who in the name of God is going to pay for it all? 
Surviving Ireland takes in culture and politics, town and country, food and drink, birth, death and everything in between. Let it be your definitive guide to this strange and bewildering rock, cowering from the cold Atlantic swells. Oh, and it’s got some funny drawings in it as well. 
* Not the Booker Prize-nominated author Colm Tóibín.

Surviving Ireland

Waldo Pancake is loved by millions for his bestselling merchandise, featuring hilariously sarcastic, arrestingly poignant messages, characterised by his own special brand of humour. 
 
This beautifully designed little book is perfect for those who seek a gift for that special person in their life but who don't want to go overboard on the schmaltz. Affectionate, yet with a twist of Waldo wit, this book is perfect for those who might struggle to find the words to express themselves. Let Waldo do the talking for you. 
 
'I love you so much that I went into a shop and bought you a little book about it.'

Love is Me Buying You this Book

Simon Mayo

Simon Mayo first opened his confessional in 1988 on BBC Radio 1's Breakfast Show. Every day, one shamefaced listener would share their deepest, darkest secret while millions tuned in to find out whether or not Simon would grant his forgiveness. 
 
Over twenty years later, Simon presents the daily Drivetime show on BBC Radio 2, and the confessions segment is back. Now those guilty listeners who missed their chance first time round have joined a whole new generation of sinners to beg for clemency from Father Mayo and his flock. From supermarket-wrecking games of 'aisle catch' to kidnapped pensioners and clandestine pet vasectomies, this is a brand-new collection of hilarious letters and emails from Simon's ever-popular show. 
 
Join the discussion on Twitter: #drivetimeconfessions

Confessions

Nora Ephron

‘Nora Ephron can write about anything better than anybody else can write about anything’ 
New York Times 
 
A bitingly funny, provocative and revealing look at our foibles, passions and pastimes – from the much-missed, bestselling author of I Feel Bad About My Neck and I Remember Nothing. 
 
From her Academy Award-nominated screenplays (When Harry Met Sally, Sleepless in Seattle, Julie &amp; Julia) to her bestselling fiction and essays, Nora Ephron was one of the most gifted, prolific and versatile writers of our time. 
 
In this classic collection of magazine articles, Ephron does what she does best: embrace culture with love, cynicism and unmatched wit. 
 
From tracking down the beginnings of the self-help movement, to dressing down the fashion world’s most powerful publication, to capturing a glimpse of a legendary movie in the making, these timeless pieces tap into our enduring obsessions with celebrity, food, romance, clothes, entertainment and sex. Whether casting her ingenious eye on public figures or herself, Ephron deftly weaves her journalistic skill with the intimate style of an essayist and the incomparable talent of a great storyteller.

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