The incorrigible toddler is now asking the infamous question: 'Why do I have to go to bed when I'm not tired?', and she uses every stratagem she can think of to avoid her fate: monsters in the cupboard, hairy spiders, thirst, even outright escape! But when she finally does go to sleep, her bed is empty. Wherever has she gone now?
MY NEW BOOK IS THE PERFECT GIFT FOR CHRISTMAS. READING IT IS JUST LIKE LISTENING TO ME ON THE RADIO . . .
WARNING: THIS IS A COLLECTION OF MY GENUINE DISTRACTIONS AND MAY PROMPT LAUGHTER.
I AN DISTRACTED BY:
Comments sent in by my listeners:
'Once I took some black puddings out of the freezer only to find a mole! I had found it in the garden and intended to send it to Chris Packham for Springwatch' Mrs D
'My mum said women of a certain age shouldn't wear beige jackets as from the back they look like a baked potato.' Lorna - Edinburgh
Travelling back in time:
I don't want to be a killjoy, but I remember a time before duvets were the norm, so I'm already apprehensive. And bearing in mind the lack of female toilets now, basic needs are going to be tricky.
Children, drunks and leggings NEVER lie
The Atom Bomb
The idea of 'the bomb' had me awake for years. I felt it might be up to me to get the cellar ready, but Mum was rather casual about the whole thing
I am genuinely distracted by everything, and I don't think I'm alone in this. I consider my love of distraction a thing to be cherished.
Like the annuals of my youth, this book is filled with puzzles, activities and mental musings. I hope that every page tickles your fancy. This book might be a perfect conversation starter at a dinner table, or the last thing you're flipping through before bed. I promise that you'll laugh at least once.
So here we go. I am passing my distractions on to you.