20 facts to get to know Tracy Beaker

1. My birthday is on 8 May. It's not fair, because that dopey Peter Ingham has his birthday then too, so we just got the one cake between us. And we had to hold the knife to cut the cake together. Which meant we only had half a wish each. Wishing is for babies anyway. They don't come true.

2. I was born at some hospital some where. I looked cute when I was a little baby but I bet I yelled a lot.

3. I am    cms tall. I don’t know. I've tried measuring with a ruler but it keeps wobbling about and I can't reach properly. I don't want to get any of the other children to help me. This is my private book.

4. I weigh   ? kgs. I don’t know that either. Jenny has got scales in her bathroom but they're stones and pounds. I don't weigh many of them. I'm a little titch.

5. My eyes are black and I can make them go all wicked and witchy. I quite fancy being a witch. I'd make up all these incredibly evil spells and wave my wand and ZAP Louise's golden curls would all fall out and ZAP Peter lngham's silly squeaky voice would get sillier and squeakier and he'd grow whiskers and a long tail and ZAP . . . there's not room on this bit of the page, but  I've  still got  all sorts of ZAPs inside my head.

6. My hair is fair and very long and curly. I am telling fibs. It's dark and difficult and it sticks up in all the wrong places.

7. My skin is spotty when I eat a lot of sweets.

8. I'm not really cross-eyed. I was just pulling a silly face.

9. My lucky number is 7. So why didn't I get fostered by some fantastic rich family when I was seven then?

10. My favourite colour is  blood red, so watch out, ha-ha.

11. My best friend is Well, I've had heaps and heaps, but Louise has gone off with Justine and now I haven't got anyone just at the moment.

12. I like eating everything.  I like birthday cake best.  And any other kind of cake. And Smarties and Mars Bars and big buckets of popcorn and jelly spiders and Cornettos and Big Macs with French fries and strawberry milk shakes.         

13. My favourite game  is  playing with make-up. Louise and I once borrowed some from Adele who's got heaps. Louise was a bit boring andjust tried to make herself look beautiful. I turned myself into an incredible vampire with evil shadowy eyes and blood dribbling down my chin. I didn't half scare the little ones.

14. My favourite animals is Well, there's a rabbit called Lettuce at this home but it's a bit limp, like its name. It doesn't sit up and give you a friendly lick like a dog. I think I'd like a Rottweiler - and then all my enemies had better WATCH OUT.

15. My favourite TV programme is horror films.

15. Best of all I like mum.

17. This was when I was a baby. See, I was sweet then. And this is my mum. She's ever so pretty. I wish I looked more like her.

18. The people in my own family are My mum. I don't have a dad. I lived with my mum when I was little and we got on great but then she got this Monster Gorilla Boyfriend and I hated him and he hated me back and beat me up and so I had to be taken into care. No wonder my mum sent him packing.

19. My social worker is called Elaine and sometimes she's a right pain, ha-ha. We talk about all sorts of boring things. But I don't like talking about my mum. Not to Elaine. What I think about my mum is private.

20. I like Story-writing best. I've written heaps of stories, and  I  do  pictures for them too. I make some of them into books. I made Camilla a special baby book with big printed words and pictures of all the things she liked best, things like TEDDY and ICE CREAM and YOUR SPECIAL FRIEND TRACY. I also like Art. We use poster paints. We've got them at the Home too but they get all gungy and mucked up and the brushes are useless. They've got good ones at school. This is a painting I did yesterday. If I was a teacher I'd give it a gold star. Two gold stars.