Why I am Not an Atheist

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What can I know? What must I do? What may I hope?

Twenty-five years ago, celebrated author Christopher Beha gave up on God. After reading Bertrand Russell’s classic text Why I Am Not a Christian, he became a committed atheist, certain that his days of belief were behind him. A youthful brush with mortality soon set Beha on a decades-long quest for meaning in a godless world.

Why I Am Not an Atheist tells the story of this search for secular answers and along the way, Beha traces the development of what he understands to be the two major atheist worldviews: scientific materialism and romantic idealism. Beha’s passage leads him to the surprising conclusion that faith preserves the best of both traditions while offering a complete and coherent picture of reality.

This deeply personal yet universal investigation delves into suffering, mortality and ultimate meaning, calling readers to take up these questions for themselves.

© Christopher Beha 2026 (P) Penguin Audio 2026