It’s Them, Not You

It’s Them, Not You

How to Break Free from Toxic Parents and Reclaim Your Story


'A supportive and practical roadmap' - NICOLE LEPERA

'Deeply validating' - EMMA REED TURRELL

'Blood is thicker than water'
'You'll miss them when they're gone'
'You can't choose your family'

How many times have you heard that family is sacred, even when your reality is different? It's Them, Not You smashes the false narrative that family is everything.

Equipping you with a deeper understanding of toxic family dynamics, resilience and wellbeing coach Josh Connolly will validate your experience and provide the tools you need to deal with emotionally immature parents and family members.

It's Them, Not You offers a pathway to heal your inner child and break free from past trauma. Whether your solution is to go 'no contact', place new boundaries or reconnect with community, this book is the ultimate handbook to help get unstuck and heal from the strongest wounds.


  • ‘Josh Connolly’s It's Them, Not You offers readers a supportive and practical roadmap to understanding and healing from dysfunctional relationships. Sharing his personal story, Josh gifts us with an intimate glimpse into his inspirational journey of self-discovery to overcome his own toxic habits.’
    Dr Nicole LePera, holistic psychologist and bestselling author of HOW TO DO THE WORK

About the author

Josh Connolly

Josh Connolly is a resilience and wellbeing coach, leading conversations around addiction recovery and dysfunctional family environments. As a certified breathwork practitioner, host of the podcast 115 Miles and founder of the Inner You self-healing programme, Josh's work resonates with people struggling to reconcile the past with the present.

Josh is also an ambassador for Nacoa – a national charity supporting people affected by a parent's drinking – and an influential mental health advocate. He has appeared on the BBC, ITV and Channel 5 News, and on programmes such as The Victoria Derbyshire Show, Good Morning Britain and BBC Breakfast.
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