Hire a Penguin Bookshelf Beautifier!

As the hectic pace of the world increases, time has become a precious commodity. With mobile phones making our attention spans shorter than ever before, and the rest of our time going to literally everything else, only society’s most chronologically privileged have minutes left over to dedicate to keeping their bookshelves tidy and organised – and fewer still, even among the time-posh, possess the expertise to do so.

There’s never been a better time, then, to get your bookshelf beautified – and Penguin has you sorted.

Penguin’s Bookshelf Beautifiers are expert organisers – rigorously trained in alphabetisation, colour coordination, genre differentiation, and the gentle putting down of books onto a flat surface – designed to fit your busy schedule. Send us an email, and we’ll send a PBB straight to your flat, mansion, or vast country estate to get working on your shelves – ready for any Zoom meeting, Instagram shelfie, and every single other time you find yourself gazing at your bookshelf and wondering: “What if?”

Services:

Basic Book Beautifying: Pick one (1) of alphabetisation, colour coordination, or genre differentiation (more than three genres extra charge), no more than 50 books.

£1250

Standard Book Beautifying: Pick one (1) of alphabetisation, colour coordination, genre differentiation (more than three genres extra charge), book value, book size (small to large, large to small extra) no more than 100 books.

£1500

Premium Book Beautifying: Pick two (2) of alphabetisation, colour coordination, genre differentiation (more than three genres extra charge), book value, book size (small to large, large to small extra) no more than 300 books. When you tire of your first pick, we will return to reorganise!

£2500

Extras:

PBBx2: For those with high-up books, add a second PBB to hold the first on their shoulders, acrobat-style.

£500

Instigation: Before leaving, our PBB will open your next to-be-read book to the first page, to encourage reading.

£250

To hire your Penguin Bookshelf Beautifier, please email editor@penguinrandomhouse.co.uk today – and post that gorgeous shelfie tomorrow!

Image at top: iStock