Imagine what a chilled-out and wonderful human being people would think you were if you lived by the simple principle: 'You can never fail if you never try.' Your wasted life would be an inspiration to others. Think of all the pointless, unhappy striving you could simply give up. Throw away that guitar! Give up on your dreams! Embrace your astounding mediocrity.

This Book Loves You has something for everyone - or at least everyone willing to give up and stop caring. If all else fails, remember: 'Don't be yourself. Be a pizza. Everyone loves pizza.'