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Peter Storey

True Storey is the compelling autobiography of notorious 1970s football legend Peter Storey, dubbed 'the bastard's bastard', who gained a reputation for ultra-violence on the pitch and had a capacity to find even greater trouble off it - a fact borne out by a string of criminal convictions and several jail sentences. 
 
 A key member, as their midfield enforcer, of the resilient Arsenal team that won the European Fairs Cup followed by the cherished Double in 1970-71, Storey was a confirmed ladies' man who loved a drink. In the mid-'70s, Storey's pub, the Jolly Farmers in Islington, became a magnet for north London villains and he rubbed shoulders with Great Train Robber Tommy Wisbey and Howard 'Mr Nice' Marks, Britain's biggest drug smuggler. 
 
 Storey talks candidly about the crimes he committed and the spells in prison that blighted his life. He reveals the truth about his feud with George Best and relays an astonishing account of how Bertie Mee tried to make him miss the 1971 FA Cup final against Bill Shankly's Liverpool side because the Arsenal manager wanted Eddie Kelly to start instead. 
 
 Today, Peter is an elusive character but a man transformed and at ease with life. Only now does he feel the circumstances are right to set the record straight and tell his side of a remarkable True Storey.

True Storey

My Life and Crimes as a Football Hatchet Man

Peter Crouch

Shortlisted for the Sports Entertainment Book of the Year at the British Sports Book Awards 
 
The funniest man in British sport - Metro 
 
Peter Crouch is a comedy genius - Daily Mail 
 
Often recruited before they've worn long trousers, today's footballers become superstars who earn huge amounts without ever learning much about the world beyond the training ground. Coddled by their support teams, everything is done for them. They live their lives in the glaring media spotlight, yet only really develop one life skill - how to kick a ball better. Then inevitably, when age catches up with them or injury strikes, these man-children are thrown out into the real world, utterly defenceless apart from their multi-million-pound bank accounts. 
 
So what do these Peter Pans, whose careers end just as most people's are getting going, do with the rest of their lives? Crouch speaks from his own experience and discusses with fellow former professionals too - just how do you safely release a near seven-foot striker back into the wild? 
 
Peter goes in search of the answer to what his second career might be and encounters stories far more bizarre than anything you'll find on the pitch. From the pleasure and pain of management to the lessons we can learn from Jamie Carragher and Joe Cole on not going to seed. From those staying in the sport - the diehard veterans, coaches, managers, owners and of course the legion of pundits, to those moving on to pastures new. Peter talks to entrepreneurs, men of the cloth, eco warriors, artists, private detectives and budding actors, as well as those who've lost their way in addiction, crime and NFTs. 
 
When the final whistle blows, it's still all to play for.

How to Be an Ex-Footballer

Peter Osgood

Martin King

Martin Knight

In a 16-year career spent with Chelsea and Southampton, goal-scoring legend Peter Osgood made 560 appearances, scoring 220 goals and winning two FA Cup-winner's medals. He was part of the victorious Chelsea side that defeated the mighty Real Madrid in the 1971 European Cup-Winners Cup final and is the last player to have scored in every round of the FA Cup, including the final. 
 
Ossie tells the story of the career and the extraordinary roller-coaster personal life of the man who spearheaded a team that made as many headlines off the field as on. The truth about the hard-drinking and hard-living antics of these Kings Road dandies - Hudson, Cooke, Baldwin and company - has never before been told. Osgood tells of his strained relationship with manager Dave Sexton, which resulted in his and other stars' departures, triggering a decline in Chelsea FC's fortunes that took some 20 years to reverse. He recounts his experience in the Mexico World Cup of 1970 and is brutally honest about the challenges and problems faced by ex-footballers as they attempt to adjust to life in mainstream society. 
 
Peter Osgood was no ordinary footballer and Ossie is no ordinary football autobiography. Like the King of Stamford Bridge himself was, this book is entertaining, outspoken and full of surprises.

Ossie

King of Stamford Bridge

**A Daily Mail Book of the Year** 
 
What happens on the pitch is only half the story. 
 
Being a footballer is not just kicking a ball about with twenty-one other people on a big grass rectangle. Sometimes being a footballer is about accidentally becoming best mates with Mickey Rourke, or understanding why spitting is considered football’s most heinous crime. 
 
In How to be a Footballer, Peter Crouch took us into a world of bad tattoos and even worse haircuts, a world where you’re on the pitch one minute, spending too much money on a personalised number plate the next. In I, Robot, he lifts the lid even further on the beautiful game. We will learn about Gareth Bale’s magic beans, the Golden Rhombus of Saturday night entertainment, and why Crouchy’s dad walks his dog wearing an England tracksuit from 2005. 
 
Whether you’re an armchair expert, or out in the stands every Saturday, crazy for five-a-side or haven’t put on a pair of boots since school, this is the real inside story of how to be a footballer.

I, Robot

How to Be a Footballer 2

Chris Hulme

People don't want to know us. They don't want to know we exist. We have all committed horrendous crimes, and they aren't going to understand why we're allowed to play football. But it's the only thing that makes our lives bearable. We play in a local league - home games only - and it doesn't matter then who you are or what you've done, you can still be a hero on match day. For those ninety minutes it's your FA Cup, your European Cup, your World Cup. 
 
Zebedee, Teddy, Bunny, Nigel, Scouse, Raph, Bumpy, Wayne, Carl, Paddy and Rizler. Eleven men - a football team. In every British town there are hundreds of amateur football teams. This team has the usual sprinkling of talent, but is otherwise unique. Nine of these players have been convicted of murder and are serving life-sentences in HMP Kingston, the other two are their warders. 
 
Chris Hulme spent a season with the Kingston Arrows - watching every game, talking to them about their lives on the inside and out and supporting them in their attempt to win the league for the first time in ten years of trying. MANSLAUGHTER UNITED - the story of the hardest football team in England.

Manslaughter United

A Season with a Prison Football Team

Jim Wilkie

The star Argentiniean striker Claudio Caniggia has described Dundee as 'a football town' and, as the favoured partner of arguably the world's greatest-ever player Diego Maradona, he should know. But why should he care? What was this man doing, plying his trade in Dundee? 
 
Dundee Football Club - the Dark Blues - do have a tradition; they have produced a number of outstanding players, won all the major Scottish trophies and, in 1963, reached the semi-final of the European Cup. For the next three decades, however, their story was one of gradual decline - and you can lose a lot of supporters in 30 years. 
 
When brothers Peter and Jimmy Marr, local businessmen, took over at Dens Park in 1997, the fans didn't know what to expect. They were a different proposition from their predecessors in that they had experience of running successful amateur and junior football clubs - but while the team performed creditably under Jocky Scott, there were still a number of very average players getting a game and the wider fan base was only inclined to attend a handful of matches during the season. 
 
Having battled to get promotion to the Scottish Premier League and build new stands, however, Peter Marr proceeded to make a leap of cultural faith. He knew that quality football was the key to any form of success and that, generally speaking, it could be found on the European continent. 
 
Marr originally expressed interest in Ivano Bonetti as a player, but when he discovered that the Italian was also interested in management, decided to embark on a footballing adventure with him. What followed has been one of the most remarkable episodes in recent Scottish football history. In the face of great cynicism and limited resources, Bonetti has assembled a squad of outstanding international talent, with his friend Claudio Caniggia the jewel in the crown. Results have been both good and bad - and sometimes downright weird - but the football has always been consistently entertaining and frequently breathtaking. No Dundee fan will ever forget season 2000-01. In this book Jim Wilkie reviews the tradition of the club and, using key profiles and reports, charts their amazing transformation to Bonetti's Blues.

Bonetti's Blues

Dundee FC and its Cultural Experiment

Simon Hughes

In Men in White Suits, Simon Hughes meets some of the most colourful characters to have played for Liverpool Football Club during the 1990s. 
 
The resulting interviews, set against the historical backdrop of both the club and the city, deliver a rich portrait of life at Anfield during a decade when on-field frustrations were symptomatic of off-the-field mismanagement and ill-discipline. 
 
After the shock resignation of Dalglish and Graeme Souness's ill-fated reign, the Reds – under the stewardship of Roy Evans – displayed a breathtaking style led by a supremely talented young group of British players whose names featured as regularly on the front pages of the tabloids as they did on the back. The Daily Mail was the first newspaper to tag Evans’s team as the Spice Boys. 
 
Yet despite their flaws, this was a rare group of individuals: mavericks, playboys, goal-scorers and luckless defenders. Wearing off-white Armani suits, their confident personalities were exemplified in their pre-match walk around Wembley before the 1996 FA Cup final (a 1-0 defeat to Manchester United). 
 
In stark contrast to the media-coached, on-message interviews given by today’s top stars, the blunt, ribald and sometimes cutting recollections of the footballers featured in Men in White Suits provide a rare insight into this fascinating era in Liverpool’s long and illustrious history.

Men in White Suits

Liverpool FC in the 1990s - The Players' Stories

Phil Rostron

Leeds United have arguably experienced the most dramatic upheaval in fortunes of any club in the recent history of English football. From their rise to a championship challenge in the Premiership and subsequent participation in the Champions League semi-finals, they plunged to the brink of bankruptcy and were relegated to the Coca-Cola League - for the first time in their proud history. 
 
 Theirs is a story of financial mismanagement on a grand scale. In living the dream, they ran up debts of £100 million, and the dream became a nightmare, not just on the pitch, but also in the tabloids, with the trials of Lee Bowyer and Jonathan Woodgate. A succession of managers - David O'Leary, Terry Venables, Peter Reid, Kevin Blackwell and Dennis Wise - have come and gone. Following on from the departure of Peter Ridsdale, a succession of businessmen have also tried to steady the ship in the boardroom, culminating in the dramatic purchase of the club by a certain ex-chairman of Chelsea - Ken Bates - in early 2005. 
 
 Under Dennis Wise, an inexperienced team was rejuvenated, with the club overcoming a 15-point penalty imposed by the Football League and pushing for automatic promotion. Sadly, their young manager departed to pastures more lucrative mid-season and the challenge died in yet another play-off defeat under the new regime of former hero Gary McAllister. What lies in store for Leeds United now? Can they regain past glories and taste Premier League football once more? 
 
 Revised and updated, Leeds United: Trials and Tribulations continues the story of Leeds' struggle, with exclusive interviews with many of the club's leading figures during this turbulent period - including Allan Leighton, Peter Ridsdale, Dominic Matteo and Peter Reid.

Leeds United

Trials and Tribulations

Peter Hooton

Now also a new documentary film written and presented by Peter Hooton, The Boot Room Boys - BT Sport April 2022. 
 
The Boot Room story starts in 1959 when Bill Shankly arrived and converted a 12 x 12 storage room into a meeting place for him and his coaches, a move that had momentous consequences, both for the Club and British football. 
 
Fans on the Kop will remember the heart-stopping extra time of the 1965 FA Cup Final, and the jubilation of winning the treble in 1984. But what was the common thread during Liverpool's glory years? It was the Boot Room. 
 
Lifelong Liverpool supporter and editor of legendary fanzine The End, Peter Hooton takes us back into that old storage room, where first Shankly, then in succession Paisley, Fagan and Dalglish drank tea, analysed, strategised, selected and deselected, and built the most successful British club in Europe in the 20th Century. 
 
Illustrated throughout with over 100 powerful never-before-seen images from the Mirror's forgotten archives, The Boot Room Boys captures the story, as it unfolded, of Liverpool's conquering heroes.

The Boot Room Boys

The Unseen Story of Anfield's Conquering Heroes

Jack Milburn

Written by his own son, Jackie Milburn: A Man of Two Halves gives an unprecedented insight into the life and career of the legendary Newcastle United forward. To this day, 'Wor Jackie' remains the Magpies' top goalscorer, having notched up 238 goals in 492 appearances in the black-and-white shirt throughout the 1940s and '50s. Milburn also won the FA Cup with Newcastle three times in five years. 
 
Jackie Milburn delves beneath the surface glory to reveal how, in spite of his remarkable success as a player, Milburn was constantly tortured by his lack of self-belief. It details his days across the Irish Sea after becoming player/coach at Protestant Linfield FC and explains why he felt the need to move on after receiving menacing threats directed at his family. It reveals how, as newly appointed manager of Ipswich Town, he had a totally unexpected falling out with the departing England supremo, Alf Ramsey. We also learn how the pressures of work took their toll on Milburn and how he spent his post-football days working in a scrapyard, before being rescued by the world of sports journalism. 
 
Later in life, many honours continued to be bestowed upon Milburn, and when he died in 1988 huge crowds lined the streets for his funeral parade. 
 
Few people had a bad word to say about Jackie Milburn, and this candid biography, with contributions from Sir Bobby Robson and Alan Shearer, expertly demonstrates why he is still held in high esteem half a century after the peak of his career and 16 years after his death.

Jackie Milburn

A Man of Two Halves

Tony Francis

Brian Clough is no ordinary football manager. He has walked on water at Nottingham Forest and through hellfire at one or two other clubs without once conceding an inch to anybody. Even his enemies are mesmerized. Tony Francis has talked at length to more than 200 people about Clough, including former partner Peter Taylor and his current chairman Fred Reacher. Why, despite his television attacks on his own supporters, did he remain his people's choice as England manager for so long?. What is the Trent Enders view of the man they used to worship whose behaviour gets stranger and stranger and whose bloated face turns even more purple? Why did Fred Reacher feel he has to issue him a warning? This book traces Clough's life from early Middlesbrough days and the knee injury that crippled him as a centre forward to the outspoken Hartlepeool manager who toppled the chairman, the idolized Derby manager who resigned on the eve of glory, the Leeds manager who told Revie's men they had won all their trophies by cheating and the triumphant Nottingham Forrest manager who took his team from nowhere to the peak of Europe and seemingly back down again.

Clough

A Biography

Paul Lake

Paul Lake was Manchester born, a City fan from birth. His footballing talent was spotted at a young age and, in 1983, he signed coveted schoolboy forms for City. Only a short time later he was handed the team captaincy. 
 
An international career soon beckoned and, after turning out for the England under-21 and B teams, he received a call-up to the England training camp for Italia '90. Earmarked as an England captain in the making, Paul became a target for top clubs like Manchester United, Arsenal, Spurs and Liverpool, but he always stayed loyal to his beloved club, deeming Maine Road the spiritual home at which his destiny lay. 
 
But then, in September 1990, disaster struck. Paul ruptured his cruciate ligament; sustaining the worst possible injury that a footballer can suffer. And so began his nightmare. 
 
Neglected, ignored and misunderstood by his club after a succession of failed operations, Paul's career began to fall apart. Watching from the sidelines as similarly injured players regained their fitness, he spiralled into a prolonged bout of severe depression. With an enforced retirement from the game he adored, the death of his father and the collapse of his marriage, Paul was left a broken man. 
 
Set against a turning point in English football, I'm Not Really Here is the powerful story of love and loss and the cruel, irreparable damage of injury; of determination, spirit and resilience and of unfulfilled potential and broken dreams.

I'm Not Really Here

Karl Ove Knausgaard

Fredrik Ekelund

Karl Ove Knausgaard and fellow writer Fredrik Ekelund kick around thoughts and ideas on football, life, art and politics. 
 
Karl Ove Knausgaard is sitting at home in Skåne with his wife, four small children and a dog. He is watching football on TV and falls asleep in front of the set. He likes 0-0 draws, cigarettes, coffee and Argentina. 
 
Fredrik Ekelund is away in Brazil, where he plays football on the beach and watches matches with friends. Fredrik loves games that end up 4-3 and teams that play beautiful football. He likes caipirinhas and Brazil. 
 
In Home and Away, two writers use football and the 2014 World Cup in Brazil to reflect on life and death, art and politics, class and literature and the most important question: was this the best football championship ever?

Home and Away

Writing the Beautiful Game

Paul McGrath

The extraordinary and heartbreaking memoir from one of football's greatest players 
 
Paul McGrath is Ireland's best loved sportsman and also its least understood. An iconic football presence during a professional career stretching over 14 years, he played for his country in the European Championship finals of 1988 and the World Cup finals of 1990 and 1994. But, behind the implied glamour of life in the employ of great English clubs like Manchester United and Aston Villa, McGrath wrestled with a range of destructive emotions that made his success in the game little short of miraculous. 
 
That story has until now never been told. It is a story that runs from a hard, hidden childhood spent in Dublin's orphanages all the way to the pain of two marriage break-ups and the struggle to cope with life after football. Quite apart from his all too public struggle with alcoholism, the story runs through the surreal highs and calamitous lows of a life lived habitually on the edge of chaos. 
 
It is not just a football story. It is an extraordinary human story that is certain to surprise with its candour. 
 
Here, for the first time, read about the father he never met; the mother whose love never died; the routine loneliness and ritual bullying endured by a black kid growing up behind closed doors in 1960s Dublin; the emotional breakdown suffered on leaving that institution; the recovery that - remarkably - brought him all the way to Old Trafford; the rollercoaster ride that followed. Here, the guilt, fear, self-loathing are all laid bare in a story fired with hope and determination for the future. 
 
It may well be the most candid sports book ever written.

Back from the Brink

The Autobiography

Mark Chapman

Alice bands, orange bladed boots and socks worn over the knee. Mansions in Cheshire, WAGs and written-off Ferraris. Referees with headsets, fourth officials, and an incomprehensible amount of stoppage time. 
 
There is only so much a true football fan can take, and in Heroes, Hairbands and Hissy Fits, Mark Chapman (aka Chappers) gives full vent to his feelings, as only the host of a football phone-in can. Football phone-ins are on the hitlist too, by the way. It is football as we know it, told from the heart. 
 
With his trademark down-to-earth wit, he takes aim at everyone from Sepp Blatter to MOTD, kit designers and replica shirt wearers (don't put your age on the back of the shirt, lads), trophy presentations and tournament draws. From his first footballing memory to watching his son grow up idolising Premier League millionaires, Chappers' book is a timely tirade as well as a love song to the beautiful game.

Heroes, Hairbands and Hissy Fits

Chappers' modern history of football

John Cairney

'Clutching in my hand my seven copper pennies, I ran down the two flights of stone stairs from our tenement flat and through the East End to Kinloch Street, where, puffing a bit, I joined the queue of other wee boys lining up to place their coins on the brass plate above the iron turnstile, push hard against it, then climb up onto the dirt terracing and into Paradise. The rest of the world called it Celtic Park.' 
 
This is a story seen through green-and-white spectacles. It begins when nine-year-old Glaswegian John Cairney walks through the boys' gate at Celtic Park and embarks on a series of adventures that, over the years, take him all over Scotland and beyond. 
 
The Sevenpenny Gate is about a search for heroes, Celtic heroes. It is also the tale of an East End club of humble Irish origins that has developed into a worldwide brand and continues to command the devotion of its fans, even with the Celtic diaspora now spread across the globe.

The Sevenpenny Gate

A Lifelong Love Affair with Celtic FC

Gary Edwards

He made you cry with laughter with Paint It White, now the celebrated Leeds-supporting, cartoon-drawing, painting-and-decorating eccentric Gary Edwards is back. It turns out that his first book was only an undercoat and now the story of his crazy life following Leeds needs a second coat. 
 
No wonder: Edwards, you see, has seen every Leeds game - competitive and friendly anywhere in the world - since 17 January 1968*. During those 37 years, he's been there, done that and bought the T-shirt. So, after subtle prompts from his travelling companions, he's back with more tales that simply would not fit into the first volume. 
There's barely a pub in the land he can step into without some well-meaning soul coming up to him and demanding, 'Loved the book, Gary! When are you going to do another - with me in it?' So here it is - another fabulously entertaining collection of travelling tales and friends remembered. Eventually. 
 
In this follow-up instalment of high gloss and drama, Edwards recounts how he befriended a real-life Leeds-supporting Dalek, convinced Rolf Harris that the earth was flat, was accosted by firemen while trying to paint a fire engine white, appeared on the sides of buses with his face painted in Leeds colours and received letters from the Queen and the Prime Minister after he complained about David Beckham getting an OBE! 
 
Leeds United: The Second Coat is another hilarious account of the scrapes, adventures and moments of comedy that a life's passion for Leeds United has brought Gary Edwards. 
 
*OK, he missed one but he still has the match ticket, and only a strike by Spanish air traffic control stopped him getting to a one-off friendly in Toronto.

The Second Coat

Paul Mullin

The memoir from Wrexham's star player, Paul Mullin - as seen in Welcome to Wrexham, a Disney+ documentary series by Ryan Reynolds and Rob McElhenney. 
 
In July 2021, shortly after being named League Two's Player of the Season and Golden Boot, Paul Mullin sent shockwaves through the EFL by taking a downwards move to National League team, Wrexham AFC. Since then, 'Super Paul Mullin' has helped transform the Wrexham team, scoring goal after goal, helping secure promotion, and capturing the imaginations of football fans across the world in the process. 
 
Here for the first time, Mullin tells his own story: his roots in Liverpool, the highs and lows of English football's promotion race, lessons learnt from his young son's Autism diagnosis, and what happens when Hollywood comes knocking at your door.

My Wrexham Story

The Inspirational Autobiography From The Beloved Football Hero

Pete May

West Ham are back in the Premiership and, to celebrate, Pete May reflects on a lifetime of supporting the Irons. It's all here in Hammers in the Heart, from a full account of West Ham's triumph against Preston in the Coca-Cola Championship play-off final at Cardiff on 30 May 2005 to his early recollections of Bobby Moore, high-leg DM boots in the North Bank, Billy Bonds' pirate chic, obscene humour in the Chicken Run, Trevor Brooking's sideburns, the FA Cup triumphs of 1975 and 1980, promotions, relegations and sides invariably 'down to the bare bones'. 
 
 With the dark humour necessary to be a Hammers fan, Pete May recalls Frank McAvennie's Neighbours mullet; Paolo Di Canio's walk-off against Bradford; 'Two Bob' Florin Raducioiu, who preferred shopping in Harvey Nichols to playing for West Ham; Iain Dowie's legendary own goal at Stockport; homeboy Joey Beauchamp; John Hartson attempting to kick off Eyal Berkovic's head in training; beating Bury 10-0 and signing their centre-half; chants of 'We want a new back four!' and relegation with the most talented side ever to go down; and, of course, the sublime skills of Brooking, Devonshire and Di Canio. 
 
 You'll laugh, you'll wince, you'll probably need a cup of Rosie Lea in Ken's Café after reading Hammers in the Heart, an epic tale of dreams that didn't always fade and die.

Hammers in the Heart

A Lifetime of Supporting West Ham

Duncan Hamilton

'Without football, we were strangers under a shared roof. With it, we were father and son.’ 
 
Inspired by his father’s devotion to Newcastle United and the heroes of yesteryear, Duncan Hamilton brings to life a bygone age telling the story of British football from the hardscrabble 1940s and the ‘never-had-it-so-good’ ’50s right through to the dowdy First Division of the ’70s and ’80s, and today’s slick Premiership. Hamilton recalls some of football’s most sublime players, managers and characters, from Bill Shankly and Jackie Milburn to George Best and Lionel Messi. 
 
But at the heart of The Footballer Who could Fly is Hamilton’s relationship with his own father. Here he tells how football became the only real connection between two people who, apart from their love of the beautiful game, were wholly different from one another.

The Footballer Who Could Fly

Bill Buford

___________________________ 
THE BESTSELLING ACCOUNT OF FOOTBALL VIOLENCE 
 
Welcome to the world of football thuggery. 
 
They have names like Bonehead, Paraffin Pete and Steamin’ Sammy. They like lager, football, the Queen, and themselves. They love England. They dislike the rest of the known universe. 
 
The beautiful game remains ugly. 
 
From following Manchster's Red Army to drinking with skinheads, acclaimed writer Bill Buford enters this alternate society and records both its savageries and its sinister allure with the social imagination of George Orwell and the raw personal engagement of Hunter S. Thompson. 
 
Among the Thugs is a terrifying, malevolently funny, supremely chilling book about the experience, and the eerie allure, of crowd violence and football culture.

Among The Thugs

Brian Clough

In interviews ranging from 1972 to 2000, Brian Clough talks about 'the real Brian Clough' - how he is perceived by other people; his bluntness and forceful opinions, and what makes him a good football manager. He also discusses the prospect of becoming an MP; his dream job; football hysteria and hooliganism; his childhood and mother's death; and being imitated by Mike Yarwood. In addition, he considers what people may say about him after his death; buying football players and having managerial ability, as well as sport on TV; leaving Nottingham Forest, and his very public falling out with Peter Taylor. 
 
 Due to the age and nature of this archive material, the sound quality may vary. 
 
©2022 BBC Studios Distribution Ltd (P)2022 BBC Studios Distribution Ltd

Brian Clough In His Own Words

Bob Bevan

Firmly established in the world of entertainment, The Cat's route to fame has been through corporate and sporting dinners. He grew up loving sport and perservered despite having only one eye and an almost total absence of natural ability. His reputation as a figure of fun and his readiness to laugh at his own failures have reaped rich rewards. 
How many of us have played football with Bobby Moore and George Best at Wembley, or played at Lord's, or written a poem teasing the Duke of Edinburgh for never recognising us? In Nearly Famous, The Cat writes hilariously of the many famous people he has worked with - everyone from Colin Cowdrey, Bobby Robson and Terry Venables to Eric Clapton, Rod Stewart, Billy Connolly, Eric Morcambe and Brian Johnston - and the highs and lows of that most serious of businesses: making people laugh.

Nearly Famous: Adventures of an After-Dinner Speaker

David Squires

Stunningly illustrated by David Squires (as featured in the Guardian), The Illustrated History of Football is a wry look at the highs and lows of the beautiful game. Laugh-out- loud and occasionally moving, it's the perfect gift for anyone who loves football. 
 
'Squires is the master of the football comic strip and this collection is recommended reading for enlightened football fans everywhere' -- Late Tackle 
'No one captures the absurdities and ugliness of football better than him ... hilarious' -- Coach Magazine 
'[Illustrated History of Football] is the funniest football tome since Viz's Billy the Fish Football Yearbook, published 26 years earlier' -- Esquire 
'Simply brilliant - my favourite football book' -- ***** Reader review 
'Completely amazing cartoons with beautiful insight as to the how, why, when &amp; wow' -- ***** Reader review 
'Simply wonderful' -- ***** Reader review 
'One of the funniest books I've read in a very long time. A must for anyone who loves football' -- ***** Reader review 
********************************************************************************************* 
Football and comics. Once a hearty Saturday combination to match cartoons and cereal, in recent years they've drifted apart. Thankfully for us, illustrator Squires is here to change all that. 
 
 In The Illustrated History of Football, his first book, Squires relives some of football's most glorious moments and meets its greatest figures. In a sport full of handsome paycheques and corporate sponsors, he also casts a critical eye over corrupt backroom workings and helps pierce football's overblown balloon. 
 
Funny, good-looking and preternaturally astute, this book is everything Sepp Blatter wishes he could be. 
More than the archetypal loo book, this is a satirical look at the highs and lows of football and the perfect gift for all fans...

The Illustrated History of Football

the highs and lows of football, brought to life in comic form…

Roger Hutchinson

Into the Light reveals the full thrilling story of Sunderland Football Club - charting the club's progress from being the first great team to dominate the Football League, to the squad which returned to the top of English soccer at the dawn of the new millennium. Hutchinson traces a journey from Newcastle Road to the Stadium of Light by way of Roker Park. 
 
The early days of the Team Of All The Talents - the side in red-and-white stripes which took the English League by storm, breaking records and their opponents' hearts year after brilliant year - are brought vividly to life for the first time. 
 
Great goalscorers like Johnny Campbell and Jimmy Gillespie and sensational goalkeepers such as the legendary Ned Doig stride out of the pages of Into The Light; and the figures whose brilliance made Roker roar - from Len Shackleton and Brian Clough to the modern greats - are vividly portrayed. 
 
League successes came easily and early to Sunderland. Into The Light explores the club's devotion to winning trophies with style. The long - and finally triumphant - quest for FA cup victories is followed game by game. The heartbreaks and disappointments are also here in this see-saw ride through 120 years of English football, which ends as it began - right at the very top. This is the history of a football club and more - it is the tale of British soccer.

Into the Light

A Complete History of Sunderland Football Club

Jason Hazeley

Joel Morris

These delightful books are the latest in the series of Ladybird books which have been specially planned to help grown-ups with the world about them. 
 
The large clear script, the careful choice of words, the frequent repetition and the thoughtful matching of text with pictures all enable grown-ups to think they have taught themselves to cope. The subject of the books will greatly appeal to grown-ups. 
 
The eight books in the series feature original Ladybird artwork alongside brilliantly funny, brand new text. The other books in the series are: 
 
- The Ladybird Book of Mindfulness 
 
- The Ladybird Book of Sheds 
 
- The Ladybird Book of The Hipster 
 
- The Ladybird Book of the Mid-Life Crisis 
 
- The Ladybird Book of the Hangover 
 
- The Ladybird Book of Dating 
 
- How it Works: The Husband 
 
- How it Works: The Wife

*A HILARIOUS, BRAND NEW BOOK IN THE PHENOMENAL LADYBIRDS FOR GROWN UPS SERIES FOR AUTUMN 2017* 
 
The Ladybird Book of Balls - The subject of sport gets the Ladybird treatment from bestselling authors Jason Hazeley and Joel Morris. 
 
This delightful book is the latest in the series of Ladybird books which have been specially planned to help grown-ups with the world about them. 
 
The large clear script, the careful choice of words, the frequent repetition and the thoughtful matching of text with pictures all enable grown-ups to think they have taught themselves to cope. Featuring original Ladybird artwork alongside brilliantly funny, brand new text.

The Ladybird Book of Balls

The perfect gift for fans of the World Cup

Bill Leckie

Penthouse and Pavement is not a book for glory-hunters. It is a book about pain. It's about the anguish of watching your team lose 9-2 in the very first game you ever saw, about the horrible inevitability of defeat that so many feel so often. It's about despair, dismay and black, frightening, deathly gloom. 
 
But it's also about hope. About dreams. And about dreams which sometimes, just sometimes, come true. Like the once-in-a-lifetime ecstasy of winning the Cup or a league. And as anyone who's had that moment-of-a-lifetime knows, the joy is even greater because you've known the pain. For Bill Leckie, who has followed St Mirren since 1964, it all became worthwhile when they won the Scottish Cup in 1987. This book is about these clubs and the people who love them. It's about the kind of fan who doesn't go to games expecting to win . . . or, worse, demanding it. This book is about being willing to accept a lifetime of frustration in return for one day of utter wonderment.

Penthouse and Pavement

How to Survive in Football Without Sucking Up to the Old Firm

Roddy Collins

Paul Howard

Roddy Collins is a football man - now in the sixth decade of a career as a player (at sixteen clubs), manager (twelve clubs) and commentator. And he is a funny man: an unequalled raconteur with a sharp eye for the absurdities of the professional game and spectacular recall. He has made friends wherever he has gone, along with some high-quality enemies. When John Delaney said he could get Roddy a job if he'd just stop criticising him, Roddy replied that he'd 'rather dig holes in the road'. 
 
Now, with the brilliant Paul Howard, Roddy puts it all down on paper for the first time - the adventures, the rows and the craic - in what is not only one of the funniest but also one of the most eye-opening books ever written about professional football.

The Rodfather

Inside the Beautiful (Ugly, Ridiculous, Hilarious) Game

Barney Ronay

Fast approaching 30, Barney Ronay is a Sunday League left back with some tough choices to make. Is staying in with his girlfriend and Gardeners' World on a Friday night doing much for his match fitness? Would he be better off back with his best mate Dan in the bachelor pad of pizza boxes, lager and Playstation into the early hours? And at their age can they still afford to spend weekends in their desperate struggle to keep Bolingbroke Athletic afloat? Shouldn't they be growing up, getting married, spending their Sundays at Homebase? 
 
This is the hilarious story of a team in early mid-life crisis, hiding from responsibility in the strange masochism at the ugly end of the beautiful game - the smell of Deep Heat, naked fat men, hangovers and the eternal belief that next week you might just rediscover your first touch.

Any Chance Of A Game?

Tony Hawks

'All I knew about Moldova were the names of eleven men printed on the inside back pages of my newspaper. None of them sounded to me like they were any good at tennis ...' 
 
An eccentric wager finds Tony Hawks, a man who loves an unusual challenge, bound for the little-known Eastern European state of Moldova. His mission: to track down members of the country's football team and persuade them to play him at tennis. The bizarre quest ultimately has little to do with tennis or football, but instead turns into an extraordinary journey involving the Moldovan underworld, gypsies, chronic power shortages, near kidnap, and a surprisingly tender relationship with his host family. 
 
Follow the fortunes of Tony in this hilarious and often moving adventure as it takes him from Moldova, onwards to Northern Ireland, leading to an exciting denouement in Nazareth - and the naked truth of the bet's final outcome ...

Playing the Moldovans at Tennis

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